What Would You Do
by lightblue-Nymphadora
Summary: Santana's bored and decides to text Rachel. Que end of boredom. Pezberry fluffiness. Rated for language and brief mention of adult things


_**LbN: Just some silliness! Happy reading :)**_

Santana stared at the white board, wondering why she'd chosen to go pre-law. The professor's voice was an awful combination of monotonous and loud—so she was bored, but couldn't sleep. Finally, she took out her phone. She still had two more hours of this torture, but Rachel was probably just getting home.

_**Hey Rach**_

_Hi Santana! Are you alright? Is everything okay?"_

_**I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?**_

_It's just that your first message lacked an exclamation point or smiley face to indicate your happiness or general contentment at whatever situation you're currently shirking in order to text me._

Santana rolled her eyes at her girlfriends ability to turn everything into a run-on sentence.

_**You read between the lines too much, Squish.**_

_I do not. By the way, you never told me what that nickname meant. I'm forced to assume it's something dirty, something I wouldn't approve of, or both._

_**Lol! I did tell you! It's not my fault you don't believe me. **_

_You expect me to believe that you randomly had a dream about a nickname and decided, "What the hell? It sounds alright."…._

_**Yup.**_

_You're weird._

_**And again, you read between the lines too much.**_

_Why are you texting me, again?_

_**Because I'm fucking bored.**_

_Language, Santana._

_**You didn't seem to have a problem with my language last night. I distinctly remember you using some of your own when you had your legs wrapped around my face….**_

_SANTANA!_

Santana bit her lip to keep from laughing. She decided to play their favorite game. Hopefully that would keep Rachel talking.

_**What would you do if I got run over by a car?**_

_I would rush to your side at the hospital. There would be tears. Lots of tears. What would you do if we won the lottery?_

_**Pay off all our student loans and buy us a house. What would you do if I got arrested for streaking through Central Park?**_

_Ask why I wasn't invited. What would you do if Quinn and Brittany wanted a foursome?_

_**Agree. Vehemently. What would you do if a baby was left on our doorstep?**_

_Seeing as I'm currently on my period and suffering from an excruciating case of baby envy? We'd be mommies. Just saying. What would you do if I duck taped you to the ceiling one night when you were sleeping._

_**I'd kill Quinn, because I would know that that was her idea. What would you do if your taxi driver kidnapped you?**_

_Attempt to stay calm and notify you. If he or she took my cell phone, I would try to incapacitate them at a stoplight. What would you do if I said I was pregnant?_

_**Faint. Then cry, because that would mean you slept with someone with a penis. What would you do if I decided to only talk in a British accent for a week?**_

_Fuck you senseless for that entire week. You know how I am with accents…. What would you do if I woke you up from a nap with my super soaker?  
**I would probably end you. What would you do if Dove and Aveeno both went out of business the same day?**_

_I would sink into a bitter depression. What would you do if I dressed up as a duck for Halloween?_

_**Laugh. And take like a zillion pictures for Brittany. What would you do if I gained superpowers?**_

_I'd make you take me flying, and talk you out of being a superhero. Nothing good ever comes of saving the world over and over again. What would you do if your iPod broke on the way home?_

_**Cry. I just bought that thing. What would you do if I told you aliens just walked into our classroom?**_

_Santana Lopez, no! We're on stage ten of our Zombie Apocalypse Battle Strategy, and have just barely made it to stage two of our Robot Overlord Contingency Plan. We are NOT ready for aliens!_

_**Okay, first, we'd be at least on stage five of ROOP if you'd separated them into categories like I suggested. Dalek versus Terminator versus Matrix would go so much faster. Second, we can't really make up a plan for aliens. We'd be fucked, honey. Because I don't care what Independence Day says, if you've made technology that can span universes and obliterate things with a nod, you're not getting taken down by a god damn Macbook Pro….**_

_You're hot when you're nerdy. :)_

_**Bitch, please. I'm always hot.**_

_Language, Santana. And I always found the Independence Day storyline convincing._

_**Are you kidding me?**_

_No. Advanced or not, our technology was completely foreign. The ships wouldn't be able to fight off a virus they had never experienced before._

_**I have no words. It's not…just…no. **_

_And I read into things too much…._

_**Don't even start with me, Squish. You rambled for an hour and a half about a My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic plotline because it was "unrealistic". **_

_If you create a universe, you should stick to the rules of that universe. That's all I was saying!_

_**Right….**_

_So are there aliens?_

_**No, but these two chicks walked in 30 minutes late with the most god awful fake bakes. Oompa loompa, doopity doo….**_

_Be nice, Santana. :)_

_**Don't wanna!**_

_Oh for Barbara's sake. Santana…why are you texting me in class?_

_**I told you, I'm bored. The teacher's going over things we should already know to help out the idiots who can't be bothered to read the books.**_

_Well, I refuse to contribute to your academic delinquency any longer. I'm going to make dinner._

_**Rachel….**_

_**Rachel?**_

_**What's for dinner?**_

_Fettucine pesto with zucchini._

_**How was your day?**_

_**Rachel?**_

_Pay attention to your lecture, Santana!_

_**Racheeellll!**_

_I'm getting in the shower now. I'll see you when you get home. :*_

_**Wanky.**_

Santana'd hoped for one more response at least. It looked like she was on her own though. With a sigh, she returned her attention to the professor and waited for class to be over.


End file.
